The human capacity for self-destruction terrifies me. 

So many of the things we do, the choices we make and the thoughts we think destroy us physically, mentally, emotionally. The scariest thing is that we so often choose to destroy ourselves. Whilst being aware of the consequences, we decide to inflict the pain upon ourselves. It is nothing less but pain because how else do scars form? Not only physical scars but emotional ones as well, the ones which others cannot see but you feel them each and every day. 

We destroy ourselves and there is no one who can save us because no one can get inside our heads and make us stop.

LP

Life is full of firsts. First steps, firsts words, first days. Tonight was a first for me - my first ever concert. And not just any concert but a Linkin Park concert. 

It was incredible; an absolute energy overload. The band as well as the audience gave the concert life. Nothing can compare with the feeling of being in a crowd of seemingly absolutely random people but who are singing in unison song after song. It also brought a feeling of nostalgia because LP has been with me for so many years. 

I don't think I'm making any sense but since this blog is full of incoherent posts I'll just make an addition to this random collection. 

Big city lights

Big city lights. 

A storm of feelings ranging from immense happiness to unbearable sadness. 

Big city life. Big city dreams. 

But it is always the lights which fascinate me. 

Nights are beautiful and they tend to be the only time when my life does not seem to fall apart. 

"You get what you work for, not what you wish for."

How painfully true that is. What is even more painful is that sometimes it is too late for you to work for something and the only thing that is left is wishing for it. And wishing very rarely gets you what you want.